ex(PR)essed

Well, I did it! I managed to have a perfectly lovely weekend with my husband without missing/worrying about my sweet girl too much. Adele had a wonderful time with her “Maam-ma,” aunt “Ket-tee,” and cousin ”Naniel.” As a matter of fact, she sobbed when they left on Sunday. There she was…stuck with boring mommy and daddy again.

Jeff and I spent the weekend at a hotel in Harrisburg with eight other couples from church at a marriage retreat. The weekend was led by our beloved pastor and his wife as well as a missionary couple from our church. There were sessions and homework. On the very first night, one of the sessions was about threats to a marriage. One of the threats was identified as infedelity, which was defined as everything from an sexual relationship outside of marriage to an unhealthy emotional connection with someone of the opposite sex. While thankfully neither of those issues are a threat in our marriage, I do think our marriage has a mistress of sorts, and she lives under our roof with us.

Since Adele was born, she has logically and understandly demanded alot of attention. And, I, especially, have more than willingly completely poured myself out for her day after day, night after night. (And, don’t get me wrong, I have loved it!) I have enjoyed feeling so completely needed, and have been delighted at the unconditional, enthusiastic way that Adele shows affection towards me.

But, when you’re giving your all to one person, there’s not much left for anyone else (including yourself). And, I think that’s what was starting to happen. Jeff is obviously a grown-up who is more than capable of taking care of himself, so I left him to do just that. And, now I realize that there must be a better balance. Jeff doesn’t need me to meet his every need, but he does want me to be a friend, partner, and ally, and that means I need to be a little more available.

I desperately want Adele to grow up in the home of two parents who are as crazy about each other as they are about her. I also want her to clearly see how our love for each other (and her!) is rooted solidly in the Lord.

So, it’s a new day for me and my hubby. While our “mistress” is likely to be under roof with us for at least another 17 years, we are newly committed to not allowing our well-intentioned affection towards her detract from our marriage relationship.

We sold our house.

About two weeks ago, a guy made an offer, we countered, and he accepted. Easy as pie. It took a little longer than we were expecting, but overall it was a pretty stress-free, low-key process.

So, selling our house was exactly what we wanted. We want Adele to have a backyard where she can safely run around, sing at the top of her lungs, or lounge in her wading pool without the watchful eyes of a dozen of our closest neighbors. We want another bedroom so Adele doesn’t lose her bed everytime we have guests. These are all good things, no doubt.

I bought the condo all by myself. I worked with a realtor, read “Mortgages for Dummies,” and made the best decision I could. I painted nearly all the rooms myself and learned a thing or two about home maintenance along the way. I hosted senior high girls for their weekly small group meetings there. I met and fell in love with Jeff there. I touched up my makeup and slipped into my wedding dress there, and I crasheed there with my brand new husband after our beautiful, unforgettable wedding day. We planned vacations at the dining room table there. We rode hundreds of miles on our bikes from the garage to whatever destination we determined for the day. We played countless games of Skipbo, Yahtzee, and Scrabble, and I happily scrapbooked in the loft. We hosted our families, a missionary from Cambodia, and a friend or two, or three. And, last August, we brought the sweetest baby girl home to there.

It’s hard to imagine my life without Cobblestone Drive.

I just have mixed emotions about leaving behind all the great memories created in that house. And, I feel just a tiny twinge of saddness when I think about all the growing up Adele will do in the next house we own. Will the next house be the backdrop for her prom pictures? Will she meet her best friend just down the street and prefer hanging out there than at home?

Don’t get me wrong: I’m definitely excited about a new place and a new start. But, I have mixed feelings. That’s ok, right?

Last Tuesday when I was blogging about my cankles, I could hardly have imagined that I was only a few hours away from meeting sweet Baby Lorow in person! Tuesday proved to be my last day of work and in the past seven days, Jeff and I have survived a challenging labor and delivery and fallen completely in love with one Miss Adele Elizabeth Lorow.

I’m a bit tired and emotional, so I can’t string too many coherent sentences together, but I do want to say that being a mother to Adele is the most rewarding, fulfilling, joyful thing I’ve ever done in my life. She has turned our world on its ear, and we don’t mind one bit. As a matter of fact, we can hardly do more than just stare at her all day.

I am learning that sleep is nice, but spending quiet time with your baby is nicer. Eating and typing can all be done with one hand while snuggling a sweet bundle of sleeping baby with the other. Love at first sight does exist: sometimes that type of love happens across a crowded restaurant but for me it happened in a delivery room at Harrisburg Hospital. Jeff is a wonderful father. I never doubted that he would be, but it’s endearing to witness.

We are completely smitten. And it’s exhausting and blissful and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

Jeff, Baby Lorow, and I are feeling very celebrated this week. After a lovely shower on Saturday, we were both treated to showers thrown by our co-workers. My fabulous PR girls chose a polka dot theme, which I love, and transformed our conference room into a beautiful party. The food was delicious, the presents were so generous, and the company was perfect, especially sweet little Clara who climbed right up into my lap in between presents! (She’s the daughter of my good friend Becky…you know, the colleague that everyone mistakes me for?! Perhaps Clara was even a bit confused? Nah…)

So, while I was living it up with my friends at Messiah, Jeff was being “surprised” by his co-workers at Delta Dental. He came home with chocolate cake with peanut butter frosting and a very generous wad of cash. We continued to feel very celebrated last night as we attempted to fit all of the baby’s new clothes, toys, books, and “equipment” into our guest room closet!

You’ll probably get tired of hearing me say this, but I do feel so blessed to have so many wonderful friends in my life, especially at this time of great change! Baby Lorow is going to be one well-loved kid!

Jeff ran the Pittsburgh Marathon on Sunday. So did my cousin Chris, Jamie’s husband Brad and brother-in-law Kevin, our neighbor Sheila’s son Bill, and about 7,994 other people. We met up with my parents, my aunt and cousin, and Jamie, Brad, Silas and Jamie’s parents for a weekend of marathon fun in the Steel City.

I spent the week feeling a bit unsure about our travels — I was fully immersed in swine flu preparations here at the College and knew exactly enough to be completely paranoid about spending two nights in a hotel, eating out, and rubbing elbows with 15,000 people at the marathon. I also wasn’t feeling well, thanks, I think, to a snuffly bout with allergies. So, I left for Pittsburgh a bit hesitantly on Saturday. However, once we arrived, it was impossible not to love being with all my favorite people in one of my favorite cities!

Marathon day was grand! It was overcast and cool — perfect for the runners and not too shabby for us spectators. I met up with my parents and aunt at their hotel so we could watch the start together before jetting down the street a few blocks to catch our runners again at mile three. It was quite a sight — runners and spectators as far as you could see! Much different than any of the other races I’ve seen Jeff do.

All the guys that I was there to cheer on were running different distances and different paces, so it was going to be a challenge to keep up with everyone. Of course, I was most devoted to my guy and wanted to see him as much possible. Therefore, I not only rushed to the 16th Bridge, but then back into downtown Pittsburgh, onto the subway, over to Station Square, and down to the street, just in time to see him pass by there. Then, it was back into downtown on the subway, walk to the hotel, and scout out a spot at the finish line.

Because the course was headed into eastern Pittsburgh, an area I couldn’t get on foot, I was going to go 16 miles without being able to see Jeff. So, we signed up for text messages so I would at least get a sense of how he was progressing, whether he was keeping on pace, and when he might finish. I was estatic each time I got a message because I knew he was keeping a perfect pace for a PR, a personal record. Sure enough, at 4:07:55, he crossed the finish line, minutes ahead of his Harrisburg Marathon time and a significantly better showing of his fitness and training than the awfully hot Erie Marathon.

I’m not always a good sport about Jeff’s training; I get frustrated by the hours he spends running and the money he spends on shoes. I don’t understand his dedication, but I admire it. And, on Sunday, when we parted ways so he could find his pace marker and I could get to the start line, I felt choked up like I have at every other one of his races. It’s just such a significant accomplishment to run a marathon, and, in those moments, I couldn’t be any prouder of him. He competes with such a great attitude.

It was also especially fun to spend this marathon with my parents! They yelled as loud as I did, and I know their hearts swelled with pride when he ran across the finish line. I’m so appreciative of how involved they are in our lives…how much joy they take in our accomplishments (big and small). Their love and appreciation for Jeff is such a wonderful sense of support and security in our marriage.

After the marathon, our gang headed to the Strip District for a celebratory meal.

Jeff and I wrapped up our Pittsburgh stay with a blissful 11 hours of sleep on Sunday, delicious breakfast on Monday morning, and rainy trip to the Pittsburgh Zoo. Before you feel bad that it rained on our zoo trip, let me tell you that I’m now convinced that rainy days are the best days to be at the zoo. No crowds and many of the animals seemed especially active and playful. We had a lot of fun…even if we were soaked and chilled to the bone!

And, though it was a fun weekend, I must close on a sad note. I posted more than a week ago about a sick fish that I was keeping an eye on at Bethany Village. When I checked on the fish last Tuesday, I found the little guy washed ashore. I was sorry to see that he didn’t make it. I hope the small acts of kindness that mom and I showed him brought at least a little sunshine to his last days.

This past week, Jeff’s parents treated us to a weekend away in colonial Williamsburg. We met them on Friday night (after surviving terrible I-95 traffic and pouring rain), and we spent all of Saturday and Sunday morning exploring the colonial shops, homes, museums, and churches of Williamsburg. The weather was dreary, but there were plenty of lovely sites to see.

A primitive kitchen, as it might have looked on a planatation.

Everyone was in their best colonial garb!

The palace gates…where the governor lived.

A church where the members of the House of Burgesses once attended service. I sat in Thomas Jefferson’s row!

Signs of Spring, even on a dreary day.

A random red window…what can I say? I’m a girl who loves red!

I’m also a girl who loves squirrels…people were feeding these little guys, and I was thrilled to take a dozen pictures while the critters enjoyed bits of ginger cake or oatmeal cookie!

And, who doesn’t love shorn sheep in the spring?

On Sunday, on our way home, we stopped in Richmond and spent a few hours catching up with our good friends Sarah and Shawn. It was such a relaxing, comfortable time…only to be followed by yet another crazy experience on I-95. This time we did it to ourselves though — to avoid some of the traffic around D.C., we opted for the HOV lane (where we saw cars moving much faster than us on Friday). However, the HOV lanes lasted much longer than we anticipated, and we missed our exit for the bypass around the city. Next thing we knew, the Washington Monument was looming on our left! We were in downtown D.C., following signs for Baltimore, and hoping for something familiar! Thankfully, we get our bearings and got headed in the right direction…it just made for a longer trip. Lesson learned though — avoid the HOV lane unless you know exactly what your exit options from it will be!

My parents live in northwestern Pennsylvania. They’ve had 100+ inches of snow so far this year, and they’re rooting for Erie to get another seven inches so that they can break a record (149 inches!) and all the cold and mess of the winter can feel like it actually means something instead of just being a significant pain in the rear.

It’s no wonder then, given the weather, that cute Dave and Linda couldn’t wait to make a break for it and head to sunnier, warmer climates. They left on Feb. 27 for a two-week stay in Indian Shores, Florida, and they invited us to join them for a few days of sun and surf. Of course, we said yes and booked our airfare immediately. You don’t have to ask us twice to leave behind the frigid temperatures and put our toes in the warm-ish Gulf. Can you see why we couldn’t wait to get out of here?

My parents had rented a condo with a beachview, so we enjoyed this type of stunning finale each and every day we were there. And, yes, we all stopped what we were doing each evening to gather on the balcony for the sunset. That’s what you do on vacation. Perhaps when Floridians travel to Pennsylvania on vacation (why?), they gather around the window to watch the snow plows go by. (Or, in the case of central Pennsylvania, they gather around to watch the snow fall without a plow in sight.)

Anyhow, there were many wonderful, beachy sights to see.

Lest you think we just stumbled upon this pile of gators, allow me to clarify. Jeff and I played miniature golf on Sunday, and the course’s claim to fame was gators aplenty! I counted 18 within a rather small area. It was a hot day, so many were catching a few rays while waiting for a tourist to pay $3 to dangle a chicken liver over the rail. We just observed them and moved on, minus the chicken thing. (For more about the golf game, check out Jeff’s blog.)

In addition to seeing lots of sea critters, we also enjoyed eating lots of seafood! We scoped out some fun, delicious restaurants. At Bubba Gump’s I ate scrumptious cocunut shrimp. No grease; perfectly crispy. Delicious! At Crabby Bill’s I enjoyed a crabcake sandwich, and on our last day, at Conch Republic, I had Baja Shrimp Tacos. Yum! Each place was very beachy and all, but I was especially fond of the “attitude” at Crabby Bill’s!

Jeff has written a funny and thorough account of our trip on his blog. It’s worth checking out, although, perhaps without being there, you won’t find some of his memories as funny as I found them.

Jeff and I love going on vacation together — we discovered what good traveling partners we are when we ventured to Maine on our honeymoon. Since then, we always look forward to an adventure away. We’re fortunate that my parents also enjoy an adventure together and invite us to join them! (Read about the Bertram-Lorow vacation adventures last year here.)

All in all, our Florida trip was great. Plenty of time for sleeping and relaxing, miniature golf and swimming, eating and well, eating! We were far from ready to come back home. Who wants to leave behind 80-degree weather and my cute parents? No one? Exactly.

My fondness and appreciation for U2 is one of the only good things that came from a failed, long-term relationship. Like everyone else in the free world, I owned “The Joshua Tree” and considered myself a U2 fan…until I met this former significant other in my life. He was a hardcore U2 fan. And, it didn’t take many listens of their other albums for me to also become a true fan. Together, we saw them in concert in 2001 (is that possible?! maybe it was `02) in Pittsburgh when they toured for “All That You Can’t Leave Behind.” It was certainly one of the most incredible concerts I’ve ever been to. The heck with the Grateful Dead…I was ready to buy a bus and stalk U2 all around the globe!

So, today the latest U2 masterpiece, “No Line on the Horizon,” was released. I’m enjoying my first free listen on Rhapsody, and I’m certain this album won’t disappoint us U2 fans.

As I’m listening to this CD, I can’t help but think about the band’s last album, “How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb.” I listened to it incessantly. Seriously. Jeff and I had just started dating, and he was wondering (aloud) whether I would ever listen to another CD again. Even now, nearly five years later, I put that CD in every month or two to get my fix.

“How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb,” despite it’s totally un-romantic title, brings back happy “when-I-started-dating-Jeff-memories.” We both had purchased the album, and, like I said, it received no shortage of air time in our cars. Who knew then that track five, “City of Blinding Lights,” would eventually serve as the song that played when we entered our wedding reception?! Or that we would donate our extra copy of the CD to the missionary who stayed with us the March after we got married? Writer’s note: Apparently we gave our extra “Much Afraid” by Jars of Clay to the missionary. Whatever.

So, while I’m totally stoked about a new U2 album release today, I’m also a bit nostalgic thinking about having Jeff in my life for the past five years. We certainly share a mutual fondness for U2, but thankfully there’s much, much more…some of which we’re just starting to discover together. Life is good.

Well, in case you haven’t noticed, I haven’t much been in the mood to blog lately. Really, all I want to do is hibernate these days. The post-holiday cold weather inspires me to sleep and leaves me feeling rather unmotivated to tackle anything else. Therefore, though I have cute pictures of a memorable sleepover with those sweet Patton girls and Christmas with our adorable nephew, I feel unwilling to take the time to upload and size the photos and properly recount all my adventures. Please forgive my laziness, and trust that we had a nice holiday, even admidst the traveling and bouts with a sinus infection (me) and strep throat (Jeff).

Well, it was never my intention to let a whole week go by without a single blog entry. This is such a wonderful time of the year for photo-taking and reflecting that nary a day should pass without something. But, alas, a week has passed and here I am. And, to make it even worse, I forgot my camera, so I can’t upload all the adorable pictures I wanted to share. Anyhow, in brief, here’s a short summation of the past week.

Last Thursday was sweet Emma’s fourth birthday. My faithful readers will remember that last year she proudly declared, “happy my birthday” throughout the evening (and Natalie took a series of scalp pictures). This year Emma was quick to remind me and Jeff that it was “her party.” We couldn’t have been happier to help her celebrate. She disappeared near the end of the party…apparently she just needed some alone time with her new ponies. She was busy playing by herself in her room when Jeff and I went up to say goodbye. Sweet, sweet girl.

Last Friday afternoon I drove north to Jamie’s for our annual Christmas extravaganza…a weekend of cookie-baking and crafting. It was also my first time to meet Silas so the anticipation was especially great! We allowed ourselves Friday night to just eat some Emeril’s soup (tradition), chat a bit about our baking plans, and admire Silas. Then, on Saturday, the extravaganza really began. We started baking around 10 a.m. and finished around 11 p.m.! 450 cookies, my friends! Sugar cookies, each individually frosted and sugared; spritz cookies…some red, some green, and some flavored with orange peel; chocolate-peppermint cookies that, sadly, required chilling and weren’t started until quite late on Saturday night (we were weary by the time they came out of the oven); and white chocolate cranberry cookies…you know, the ones everyone skips over on the cookie trays because they’re afraid of fruit. Jamie and I think they’re delicious though, and they look so festive, so we made them anyhow.

Sunday I got some fun snuggle time with Silas before church and then we enjoyed a relaxing afternoon of stamping. Silas was a perfect addition to our extravaganza…well behaved and very helpful! I can only imagine what fun he’ll be next year!

On Monday the mood changed a bit when I learned around lunchtime that my grandmother had passed away. I knew before I left for Jamie’s that she wasn’t recovering well from a bout with the flu, but I was hoping she would rally back to good health, as my grandfather had done many times. This is certainly one of those situations where you don’t want to see your loved one suffer even one more minute, but you can hardly stand the thought of life without them. It’s been a sad week for me in that regard. My grandma and I, as she liked to say, were “very good friends,” and we enjoyed many happy shopping trips, cajun catfish meals at Cracker Barrel, and walks around the family farm together. I will (already do) miss her very much.

I was reminded this week of the blessing of family. My brother came home from California, and it was so nice to see him. We spent time with my Aunt Barb, one of my favorite people. And, my cousin John, who I don’t see enough anymore, was around with his oldest daughter. Of course, I have the best parents, and they were a source of comfort and encouragement during what was certainly a difficult time for them as well. And, outside my immediate family, I felt much love and support from my church family. I am blessed. (Did I mention my sweet husband? He is wonderfully sensitive, gracious husband, and all the Bertrams adore him…especially me.)

So, now I’m wrapping up a rather disjointed week at work and looking ahead to two full weeks off! Tonight, Natalie and Emma are sleeping over…our first overnight with them and their first sleepover in several years. Oh boy! I have much merriment planned…cookie baking and decorating, painting, movie watching, and sleeping (hopefully!) under the Christmas tree. Then, tomorrow night, we’re hosting our small group for a Christmas open house. It will be great to reunite with those friends for a few hours; they were such an important part of our fall.

So, there’s the wrap-up, but, sadly, without photographs. I trust that each of you are well and wish you a wondefully joyous holiday season!